


glitter: the herpes of the craft world

by nataliewrites



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Australian accents are horrible to write when you're Australian, Jack is awkward, Jackrabbit vday 2014, Jamie is a little shit, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-24
Updated: 2014-02-24
Packaged: 2018-01-13 15:20:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1231402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nataliewrites/pseuds/nataliewrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Day Jack Frost Realises He Has a Crush And Subsequently Tries To Do Something About It is a painful and traumatic event for all involved. </p><p>Or, Jack tries to woo Bunny via lame pick up lines and a Valentine's Day card.</p>
            </blockquote>





	glitter: the herpes of the craft world

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ZombzWontGetMe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZombzWontGetMe/gifts).



> This fic is a prompt fill for the Jackrabbit Valentine's Day thing happening on tumblr right now, and I was given tumblr user bunnysfrost! Her prompt was "Jack works really hard on a really lame Valentine card for Bunnymund. or Jack tries a bunch of cheesy pick up lines on Bunnymund." and this is what happened. I had a lot of fun writing it, so hopefully everyone likes it!
> 
> Special thanks to Nadyeahh for editing.

The Day Jack Frost Realises He Has a Crush And Subsequently Tries To Do Something About It is a painful and traumatic event for all involved. 

His day starts off innocently, as most of them do. Jack is riding the Wind, letting her carry him wherever she pleases. He freezes a water pipe in Egypt, and creates a snow day in Burgess, in honour of Cupcake’s birthday. On his way across the US, he conjures mini snow clouds and laughs as they follow specific people down the street. In Britain, he throws a snowball in the midst of a group of children and watches with glee as a mammoth snowball fight ensues.

It is a normal day for Jack Frost, and he does not expect something so horrifying to happen. 

As he is flying over the Philippines and debating on what to do, Jack’s thoughts stray to a particular rabbit. He is Jack’s latest project: Bunny, the antisocial workaholic who is seemingly incapable of having fun. He cannot sit idly by and let such a horrifying crime take place, and so he has devoted the past few months to pestering the Pooka with minor pranks, in the hopes of making him laugh. It's slow progress, but he's taking it as good progress - after all, Jack’s limbs are always intact afterward, because he has finally learnt his lesson and he will  _not_  mess with Easter again. 

Jack continues on his merry way, already planning more pranks to pull on Bunny. Unbeknownst to Jack, a strange thought is worming its way out of his subconscious and taking root in the forefront of his mind. It is nothing at first; just a small, niggling feeling that he is missing something big. However, he is extraordinarily talented at ignoring things until they can’t be ignored anymore, and so he leaves the thought to fester.

A few hours later, as the Wind is carrying him over Australia, the realisation hits him fully. Jack tumbles out of the air with a mortified scream. The Wind catches him just in time, laying him on his back with a soft  _whump_. Jack rolls over, burying his face in the ground, and promptly waits for death. His face is burning up as his mind repeats the same sentence over and over again.

_Jack Frost has a crush on the Easter Kangaroo._

 

* * *

 

‘C’mon, Jack,’ Jamie stands in front of the frost spirit, arms crossed. He is leveling a steely glare at him, trying to look intimidating. However, Jamie is in his awkward teenage phase – gangly and disproportionate, and he is not so much imposing as he is adorable. ‘I know you like someone. Now tell me who it is!’

‘No.’ Jack glares back, resolute. He can still barely think about The Day He Realised without accidentally causing a snowstorm in panic, and Jack has vowed to take his feelings to the grave. 'How did you know, anyway?'

Jamie throws up his hands in frustration, ignoring the question. Jack doesn't think too much of it. Jamie seems to _know_  things; he calls it women's intuition. Jack thinks he's been hanging out with Cupcake too much. ‘How am I supposed to help you, if you won’t even tell me who it is?!’ 

He raises an eyebrow. ‘What makes you think I want help?’ 

Jamie stares at him with raised eyebrows, and Jack feels a blush creeping along his cheeks. It’s no secret that he needs all the help in the world when it comes to romance – and he’d gladly take any advice on the matter, but saying it aloud is just too embarrassing. Of all the people it could have been, it's his long-standing-rival-turned-friend. Bunny has just barely learned to tolerate him; romantic advances are out of the question for at least the next millennia. It is not comforting to think that his feelings will not be returned, but Jack finds solace in the knowledge that at least he isn't fooling himself.

'Is it Tooth?' Jamie asks, head tilted. 'I mean, she's really pretty.' 

'What? No!' Jack says, almost scandalised. Tooth is gorgeous, but she is like a sister and a mother to him.

'Sandy?' Jamie asks, looking concerned. 

'He's made of  _sand_!' Jack says exasperatedly. True, he thought at one point about a hundred years back that he harboured some kind of affection for the Sandman, but Jack quickly realised that it was simply - thankfully - misplaced admiration. 

'That would be uncomfortable,' Jamie concedes, and Jack looks at Jamie in horror. The boy ignores him, determined to uncover the identity of Jack's crush. 'North?'

 _'No!'_  Jack screeches, trying to banish the slew of mental images Jamie was presenting him with. North, lying on a bed covered in rose petals, beckoning him forward…

(He isn't able to look the Guardian in the eye for a long time after this conversation.)

'It can't be Bunny, you guys hate each other,' Jamie continues, unperturbed. He waits for Jack's dismissal of the idea, but none is forthcoming. When he looks up curiously, he sees the spirit looking determinedly out the window, blushing a dangerous-looking bright red. '… Oh my god,' Jamie breathes. _'Oh my God.'_

'Jamie,' he says warningly.

'It's  _Bunny_ ,' Jamie repeats, eyes wide. He dodges a snowball to the face, giggling. 'That's… not surprising.'

'Really?' Jack asks, surprised.  

'Yeah,' he looks thoughtful. 'I can see it working.'

Blushing, Jack fiddles with the sleeve of his hoodie. He doesn't want to dwell too much on any positive outcomes, knowing they are all farfetched. If he ever had a chance, the blizzard of '68 ruined it. Bunny will carry that grudge for the rest of his life, and while he thinks it's a little unfair, he doesn't blame the kangaroo. He is very protective of his holiday, and Jack had been very careless. But, in his defense, he hadn't  _known_  it was Easter!

(He  _had_ , but no one needed to know that.)

'You should do something about it. Valentine's Day is tomorrow!' Jamie says, in a voice that clearly means that there will be no arguments on this matter. There is an excited grin on the boy’s face, and to Jack, it feels strangely like a death sentence.

He’d rather take North and the rose petals, at this point.

 

* * *

 

A few hours later finds Jack on the floor of Jamie’s room, surrounded by sheets of paper in disgusting shades of pink and red, as well as various markers, paints, glues, and many other things Jack is afraid to touch – like glitter. Jamie had solemnly informed him that, should he get glitter on him, it would never come out. He has since decided that it is some kind of hellish creation reserved only for the likes of Pitch Black, and refuses to go near the Tubes of Death.

‘Can I get up now?’ Jack whines, feeling hopeless. 

‘No,’ Jamie says, resolute. ‘You are not getting up until you make him a card.’ 

With a groan, he looks down at his failed abomination of a card. There is an Easter egg drawn on the front, in dark blue marker – which he hadn’t realised would look quite so awful on red paper – with the words “Be Mine” in block letters. If he was feeling generous, he would say it looks like a child’s art project. If the child had crawled from the Underworld, that is.

‘I can’t give him this!’ Jack protests, holding up the failed card. Jamie grins, but, to his credit, does not laugh. ‘Can’t you just make one for me?’

‘It has to be made by you,’ he rolls his eyes, turning back to his computer. ‘You know that, Jack. C’mon. Pick nicer colours, and try again.’ 

Four hours, lots of snowballs and yelling later, Jack is covered in glitter and completely traumatised. But, he has a decent-looking Valentine’s Day card, covered in drawings of snowflakes and frost patterns, which have been accented with glitter. “Be My Valentine?” has been written on the front. Jamie had talked him into writing "What's my shirt made out of?" on the inside, instructing Jack to answer with "boyfriend material", should Bunny ask. 

‘Here,’ Jamie thrusts a sheet of paper into his hand. ‘Use these too, so he thinks you aren’t joking around.’

Skeptical, Jack reads through the list. ‘Did you sit in a pile of sugar? ‘Cause you have a pretty sweet a-  _Jamie, I can’t say these!_ ’ 

But Jamie has stopped listening, and is already pushing him out of the bedroom window, yelling, ‘Stop wasting time! Spend tonight practicing, and first thing tomorrow, go see him! Good luck!’ 

The Wind catches Jack as he tumbles out of Jamie’s window, carrying him gently out to the lake. He sits at the edge, looking bleakly at the card and pick-up lines. There’s no way that the responsible and reserved kangaroo would ever feel anything for immature little Jack Frost, is there? They’ve spent so long at each other’s throats that he knows this won’t go down well. If he’s lucky, Bunny will take all of this as a joke and think nothing more of it.

But still… 

No matter how much he wants to ignore it, part of Jack is still hoping for a happier ending to all of this.

 

* * *

 

It’s Valentine’s Day, and there is a dread in Jack’s stomach that is entirely inappropriate for the holiday. Delaying the inevitable, he wanders through the streets of Burgess, watching the happy couples around him, laughing and smiling and generally acting disgustingly sappy. There’s always a special magic on Valentine’s Day that puts an extra spring in everyone’s step, and it buoys his spirits too. He reaches his lake again, and smiles at his reflection. Maybe, just maybe, this will work. Now he just has to get to the Warren.  

A few months ago, Bunny had told him that the mountains in Australia sometimes received snow. Fascinated, Jack had gone to investigate - and he'd found a strange hole in the side of one of the mountains. Being right at the top, Jack knew that it would have been impossible for a human to find their way up there. So, he'd stepped in. As he very narrowly escaped plummeting to his second death because of the immediate drop, Jack had to marvel at the tunnel itself - and at the Wind's ability to save him no matter what he was doing. It was smooth; obviously carved out of the mountain itself. He'd kept walking pointlessly, even when the Wind could no longer follow him. After what felt like forever, Jack had decided that he should maybe come back with a torch, and turned to leave, when the faint scent of flowers reached him. To this day, Jack cannot believe that he'd found an entrance to the Warren. Even if the entrance cannot be closed (which Bunny has never specified), it could easily be blocked off to prevent access. Jack is strangely giddy whenever he thinks about the fact that Bunny is more or less letting him enter the Warren as he pleases. He made a promise to himself to stay away in the months leading up to Easter - but this is important, damn it!

'Bunny?' Jack calls nervously. The Warren is strangely calm. This close to Easter, Bunny is usually flat out. There are a few stray eggs launching themselves into the river, but it is nowhere near the squadrons that Jack saw the last time he was here.  _Maybe he's just taking a break,_  Jack thought to himself, before rolling his eyes. It'd be a cold day in hell before Bunny took a break.

 Jack is a winter sprite through and through, but he is always struck by the beauty of the Warren.It is alive in a way that winter never is - there are insects buzzing above the swaying flowers, and a soft, unknown breeze gently ruffles his hair. A stray egg or ten can be seen running around, and it never fails to make him grin. The still beauty and grace of winter will always have his heart, but some days the emptiness is far too much - he remembers all the times he's been walked through, and suddenly he cannot breathe and he needs to get  _away_. The Warren has become the sanctuary he flees to in these moods, and he is eternally grateful to Bunny for providing it. Jack will never mention this, though. The teasing would be relentless.

'Frostbite?' Jack turns to see Bunny, an egg in one hand and a paintbrush in the other. 'What're ya doin' here?' 

'Nothing,' he replies casually. The card is tucked safely into his hoodie, and he grins in an attempt at nonchalance.

 Bunny is not convinced. 'Listen, mate - I'm fine with ya comin' in and out, but Easter is soon. I'm busy, and I don't have time to keep  _you_  outta trouble.' He places an emphasis on the word ' _you_ ' and glares pointedly. Jack has the decency to blush.

'I'm not here to destroy anything!'  _Except my dignity_.

 'Right,' Bunny moves to turn away, and Jack races to stand in front of him. He can see the rabbit's nerves wearing thin, and he's suddenly nervous. He has to act now, or he'll be kicked out until after the Easter holiday. And he is not waiting that long.

'I wanted to see you today.' Jack admits, and that stops Bunny in his tracks. However, he still looks suspicious.

'What're ya playin' at, Frost?' he asks. 'What's so special 'bout today?'

'… You don't know what day it is?' 

'Mate, I've been paintin' eggs for the last week 'n a half. If it isn't Easter Sunday, I'm not interested in what day it is.'

Jack privately considers this a blessing. He could make his escape right now, and play this off as a failed Valentine's Day prank later on. Bunny would be none the wiser, and Jack can continue to ignore his feelings. He does not want to risk their shaky friendship for the impossible. But then he thinks of Jamie, who wants nothing more than for Jack to be happy; who helped him make his card, and printed out horrifying pick-up lines for him. Jamie believes that he can do this, and maybe he can. After all, coming back from the dead as the spirit of winter is also widely regarded as impossible - and he managed that quite effectively. 

 'It's Valentine's Day,' Jack says.

 'There's glitter in yer hair,' Bunny says at the same time.

'What?' They say in unison, and they smile at each other as Jack ruffles his hair futilely, watching a few specks of glitter float to the grass. 

 'It's Valentine's Day,' Jack says again, quieter now. He is definitely more confident now than he was a few minutes ago, but he is still terrified. 

'Yeah?' Bunny says, obviously waiting for him to continue. 'So?' 

' _So_ , it's Valentine's Day!'

'Great, thanks for the heads up, Frostbite. I'm goin' back to work now.' Bunny looks annoyed, brushing past Jack to disappear into the depths of the Warren. The unintentional rejection infuriates Jack. He has suffered through  _arts and crafts_  with Jamie to make him a card, and had practiced mortifying pick-up lines until he had accidentally caused a blizzard from embarrassment. He has been alone for a long time, and the outward expressions of affection that he's trying to convey are well out of his comfort zone. The least that Bunny can do is reject him after he's through with his whole routine.

'I want you to be my Valentine, you stupid kangaroo!' he yells.  

Bunny freezes for a few seconds, before slowly turning around to face him. Frustrated, Jack holds out the card. Bunny sets down the egg and takes the card, carefully. To an onlooker, it would seem that Bunny is treating the card as if it were the most precious thing in the world. However, Jack Frost the Drama Queen, does not see it like this.

'Frost -'

'Don't worry,' he says petulantly. 'You can hold it properly. It isn't diseased.'

That earns him a raised eyebrow. ‘When did ya make this?’ 

‘The other day.’ Jack looks away, blushing. ‘Jamie helped me.’

Bunny has not yet laughed in his face or kicked him out of the Warren yet. These are both very good signs. Maybe…

‘What’s ya shirt made of?’ Bunny asks curiously, and Jack remembers the inside of the card with terror. Staring up at the imposing Pooka, all the confidence from before has fled. He can’t do this.

‘Well?’ 

Jack stares, eyes wide, and he mumbles something. He’s sure that the rabbit’s ears can pick up on it, with their crazy super hearing.

‘What’d ya say?’ Bunny asks anyway. Probably to torture him. That’s definitely it, Jack decides. Oh, he’s going to cause the worst blizzards on Easter Sunday… ‘Frost?’

‘Boyfriend material,’ Jack repeats in a horrified whisper. Bunny stares at him for a moment, before bursting out in laughter. He takes a moment to appreciate the sight of the Pooka laughing, privately congratulating himself on the achievement. But then he remembers what is being laughed at, and all good feeling is gone. So close, and yet so far. Jack is stupid for ever thinking that this could work. He slams his staff down on the ground, freezing the patch of grass around them. That gets Bunny’s attention.

‘I tried, okay?’ Jack snaps, humiliated. ‘I sat through  _card-making_  and I let Jamie basically shower me in glitter and I practiced  _pick-up lines_  because he told me it’d help. The least you could do is reject me and laugh when I’m gone!’

Something clicks, and Bunny’s expression is suddenly unreadable. ‘Yer bein’ serious about this?’

Jack scowls. ‘Yeah, I was. You could’ve just said no.’

With that, he turns to leave. He has had enough of the stupid kangaroo and this stupid Warren and the dumb little Easter eggs with their weird little legs. He can’t think of a single reason why he liked this place at all. He can’t wait to be back out in the cold air, making snow days and participating in snowball fights. 

There are suddenly paws on his shoulders, and Jack yelps in a very manly fashion as he’s spun around.

‘Ya coulda waited ‘til I answered,’ Bunny says, and he rolls his eyes. If the rabbit wants to drag out his rejection, then let him. It’ll only mean more blizzards on Easter Sunday. ‘And I say yes.’

It takes a few moments to register that he’s talking about being Jack’s Valentine. 

‘… What?’ he asks dumbly. He can hardly believe it.

Bunny steps back, picking up the egg that had been dutifully sitting on the grass during the exchange. He holds it out to Jack, who holds the egg carefully. It is a mess of blues, whites and greys. He does not understand at first, but as he turns the egg around in his hands he realises that the egg depicts a snowstorm, with two figures standing in it – one very large and very furry, the other very small and very human. The implications of the egg catch up to him, and Jack looks up at Bunny with wide eyes and bright red cheeks. In response, the Pooka nudges him in the shoulder.

‘Happy Valentine’s Day, ya gumby,’ he says, pulling the sprite into a hug. There is a fondness in his voice that Jack has never heard before, and it makes him weak in the knees.

‘Hey, Bunny,’ Jack says, suddenly mischievous. ‘Did you sit in a pile of sugar?’ 

Bunny frowns. ‘No.’

‘Cause you have a pretty sweet ass,’ he grins up at Bunny, wickedly. He is suddenly grateful for the plethora of pick-up lines he rehearsed, because he’s definitely got a purpose for them now.

This time, he does not mind that Bunny laughs.


End file.
